Home. Over the years this word has come to mean more and more to me. From a happy and constant childhood home, through transient student/traveller years, to setting up a life and a home with my partner; the importance of this concept has shifted for me. As Alan and I plan hopefully for a home birth for our baby, as we prepare the baby’s room, the significance of Home increases day by day.
This post is in honour of my dear friend and blog partner, Kirk, and his incredible wife, Jody.
Yesterday Jody birthed their beautiful baby daughter Eliot at home. Kirk shared a picture of Jody in labour in their bedroom, looking strong, powerful, and in her own domain. I am so inspired by Jody and so heartened that their wish for a home birth came true.
Alan and I have spent the last few years making our home into somewhere that we both feel relaxed and comfortable, where we find the aesthetics of our surroundings pleasing, and where memories layer to trigger an ever-deepening feeling of connection to one another. This is the first home we bought together, and we moved here bringing memories of the home we shared before. I feel safer here than anywhere else.
A solid base like this allows me confidence to venture into the world and take risks, be vulnerable, introduce myself to people and forge connections. I can be bolder in my life if I know I have a safe cave to retreat to. I can actually feel more part of the outside world because I can get away from it when I need to.
When I birth our baby, I don’t want to feel vulnerable, take risks, or be around new people. I want to feel safe in my cave, warm and private, and with my partner and my sister. I want our baby to be born where he will live. I want our life to look like family life the moment he is here.
I know that complications may arise which could prevent this dream birth story from coming true. Thankfully the last year taught me more about acceptance and letting go of plans than I knew I had capacity to learn. If this baby boy is born in hospital, so be it.
Today though, I am truly thankful that my friends Kirk and Jody have their baby safely with them and that they have no journey to make to get back to where they live as a family. Home.