Come In From The Cold

Over a hundred posts ago, we managed to find a way to create a method of partnering in our shared interests, despite living on different continents. We founded what became a forum for some of the questions we have, an outlet for some of our ‘ponderings’ and ideas, and a context for connecting with others interested in community, welcome, friendship, and inclusion. That is (was) Come In From The Cold.

And now we feel we have reached a natural ending. We revisited our direction a few months ago, and that brought forth some clarity and purpose. But during the last month we have both felt the ending reveal itself to us. This week we had a very fun Skype conversation and committed to put Come In From The Cold to bed.

Happy faces!

We didn’t make the decision lightly. We have loved this space, and feel enormous gratitude for the support and encouragement you have offered us. But we did make the decision easily. It is just time, and it feels good and satisfying to recognise that and respond. We want a dignified end for a thing we love. ~Linda

What I’ve learned, and continue to be open to (as pushed by brilliant teachers, mentors, partners and friends I’ve been blessed with) is the notion of co-creation.  First off, if we remain open as we interact with the world around us, give of ourselves in totality to those we come across and interface with in life, what emerges are fascinating opportunities.  July 2012, Linda and I were open to a new friendship and partnership.  Many a conversation about our lives in our own places, our work, our core values, our ethos and our families, led us to a cross-continental project that has been this blog for the past 2 1/2 years.  Come In From The Cold pushed me to remain open, to allow for evolution of mind and spirit, and gave me a forum to speak my voice, share my thoughts and ask questions that remain unanswered.  Linda in particular, pushed me, and still pushes me, to be as authentic a human as possible.

Good people reading this now and who have supported us from day one…I’m overwhelmed by the amount of love and support you have poured onto us during this project.  We never imagined the amount of love we would feel from doing this, let alone anyone really wanting to read and/or listen.  It’s been an incredible journey and we aren’t done yet!!  This closes a chapter, but from this, a new beginning (as Linda aptly named this post) is born in our partnership.  Stay tuned…but don’t hold your breath, it may be a while 🙂   Sending my love and gratitude to you all!!  ~Kirk

Partners in blogging!

The Picnic

In a little rainy mist of white and grey
we sat under an old tree,
drank tea toasts to the powdery mountain,
undrunk got merry, played catch
with the empty flask, on the pine needles
came down to where it rolled stealthily away – 
you lay
with one arm in the rain, laughing
shaking only your wet hair
loose against the grass, in that enchanted place
of tea, with curtains of a summer rain
dropped round us, for a rainy day.

- Edwin Morgan

Greetings dear friends!  I’m in the midst of a book titled, “Deepening Community: Finding Joy Together in Chaotic Times”, a gift given to my by the outstanding Chris Lee, and written by Paul Born.  Paul Born lives and works in Cambridge, Ontario in Canada.  Paul Born is the co-founder of the Tamarack Institute, http://www.tamarackcommunity.ca, whose ‘about me’ tab on their website reads:

“Founded in 2001, Tamarack is a charity that develops and supports learning communities to help people collaborate and to co-generate knowledge that solves complex community challenges. Our deep hope is to end poverty in Canada.”

I thought I’d just give you their explanation word for word, so as not to confuse anyone with how I paraphrase people who are brilliant with my incredibly long-winded ramblings 🙂

Paul Born

In exploring the Tamarack Institute, via their website, I discovered they host and facilitate different learning communities with individual, specific websites holding questions, conversations, providing avenues for publications via blogs  and disseminate resources people who are interested.  I joined Seeking Community, http://www.seekingcommunity.ca, for several reasons…but let me just do as I’ve done before and give you their mission word for word:

“Imagine: city planners designing neighbourhoods to increase social capital; elderly people staying in their neighbourhoods for another 5 years; mental health rates declining because neighbours are caring for each other and creating a greater sense of connection and belonging together.  Seeking Community is a Learning Community for individuals who care about the vibrancy of their communities.  Our aim is to encourage and connect individuals who are hosting conversations to recapture the idea of community; to make it a guiding force in organizing our neighbourhoods and institutions and for envisioning policies for well-being.

Seeking Community brings together people with diverse experiences and understandings of community into a dialogue about the importance of having a deepened sense of community. This online community allows you to create a profile, listen to podcasts, post blogs, post links to other websites, and other resources. Our Learning Community includes ten Thought Leaders: people who bring various insights and expertise into this overall dialogue. Over the next 3 years, we will host 1,000 conversations about community. Our online Learning Community will act as a vibrant space to document these conversations; analyze them to see what patterns emerge; and engage the Learning Community in co-generating insights from this data.  Once clear understandings begin to emerge, we will bring these to policy makers, celebrities and other people of influence to propose policy changes that acknowledge the importance of community.”

This is an e-newsletter they publish…one example of the general awesomeness of this community…

Anyone who knows me even remotely, understands how elated I am to have found these people…and I’m even more thrilled to take advantage of how welcoming this community is of new people and the desire to hear from a broad range of people…all for the common good!!  I’m now a member of this learning community, and I encourage all of you to check out the links I posted and see if it’s something you’d be into.  I remain thirsty to grow in this idea of connection. I remain open to hearing from any and all people who want to talk about it.  I am seeking community…a deepening community. I’m so grateful to Chris for having given the simple gift of a book, yet with intention, knowing who I am and what I’m into…I thank you Chris for being a true friend.  And since I’ve decided to share words with you directly from these wonderful people and what they are up to, I’m going to leave with you a poem written by Paul Born, titled “Finding Together”…it is all I want to read these days…over and over and over again!  Sending my love and gratitude to you all…

Finding Together

spending time together with…

friends

family

colleagues and associates

…just about anyone is such joy

To play, to visit, to eat, to sing even to pray …

opens me to the other – we

connect

converse

commune

What am I longing for if not this?

Do I really want more?

Do I have more to give?

If so what?

What are my longings? …

belonging?

commitment?

faithfulness?

They tell me I cannot have these things, that I am a dreamer ?

They do not say this kindly as if telling me to stop.

You have a good life – open your eyes be happy.

Or look – you already have these things, your family, your wife.

Yes, I say – I see these but I want more and it is not because I am unhappy.

What might it be like to wake up…

And know…

And feel…

And accept…

That I am part of something bigger

Something intentional, hopeful, safe.

Where my neighbours have committed,

Where I have committed

Where we have committed to each other

Where the world is better

Where our lonely resides

Where our fear rests

Where our tears are harvested

And our dreams nourished

A place where truth is easy

And visions are shared

Where my best greets your best

And where living together is easy because

I is We and We is Us.

They say you speak of heaven

Such places only exist in our longing

There is no place for such places in the now.

But still I long and wonder…

What must I give, how deep must my longing be to live such a life?

Let’s hold this together…

Hello dear readers,

Thank you again for being patient while we took a wee break to consider our direction and to refocus. We feel clearer and more purposeful, and we are ready to move forwards!

We have revisited our mission and revised it to better describe where we feel we are with the blog these days. Please read it and let us know what you think! We really do welcome feedback.

In the coming weeks you can expect more posts that connect with this revised mission, including some interviews with community builders from San Diego and Scotland (and who knows, maybe elsewhere too!)

Thank you again for sticking with us,

Linda and Kirk

Through our reflecting, pondering and wondering of where we are headed with Come In From The Cold, I journeyed back to Linda’s original post, THE FIRST post, of this blog. Click here and take a look back at: The best welcome I ever got.  In it, you’ll find gems like:  “In a group of friends as established as this one there is inevitably a lexicon of inside jokes which could potentially alienate a newcomer, but this group of folk made sure I was included.”  This reminds me of how Judith Snow describes that with any vibrant, well-connected community of people, and natural ‘edge’ will form.  What makes a community inclusive, is to have ‘a welcome at your edge’.

Read on dear followers!!  We are close to posting new material!!  So for now, enjoy our favorites from the past!

The best welcome I ever got

Here we are with another blast from the past. I felt really excited to read this one, because I had forgotten all about Kirk taking this step with his church community! And as we reflect on what this blog is really about, it struck me as powerful that Kirk considered how to make sure that the initial welcome was only the beginning for new and existing members of his church. There are layers of community, and there are tools to move from one layer, deeper down to the next… Enjoy reflecting on that as you read: An Open Letter to One of my Communities! 

Dear friends, we are benefitting from this fallow period at Come In From The Cold, but we want to continue to honour your support by sharing a past post with you today. I just reread Kirk’s post from February last year, Building Community One Latte At A Time and remembered how much I enjoyed hearing about Svetla! She uses her business to promote community (as well as providing coffee), and the customers she welcomed find delightful ways to thank her and nurture her business. Enjoy!

Greetings everyone!  As Linda alluded to last week, we are taking a step back, pondering our direction, refueling our fires and will be posting fresh again in June. In the meantime, we invite you all to do as we are, and peruse past posts.  The post I’m linking today, written by Linda in our first year of existence as a blog, draws us into her roller coaster at the time of adoption and pregnancy.  Her vulnerability emerges as the piece unfolds and we are given a glimpse into her and her partner’s deepest fears and joys…along with brilliant news!

Have a look and enjoy:  Still Welcome

Dear friends, this post goes up late because I just lost track of the days! I am relaxing with my family, and thought it was still Sunday. Isn’t that lovely? But still, sorry for my tardiness.

As we approach our second birthday Kirk and I, or ‘The Management’ as he wryly terms us, are taking stock. So we will be back with you in June with some fresh new ponderings. In the meantime, we would like to point you back to some of our pieces from the first year of Come In From The Cold posts. We will take it in turn to link you back to some favourites of one another’s writing. I just very much enjoyed rereading Kirk’s post, ‘Only three percent? It’s a start…’ I am sure you will enjoy revisiting it too! I know Kirk has done a lot of work on getting to know his neighbours better, so committing himself here clearly paid off. Here’s a little quote from his piece, which seems like a motif for life: ” I have a real sense of where I need to go, and it’s next door!”

Have a good week, friends!

In the spirit of not ‘forcing the issue’ with my writing, I’m posting a series of photos I shot on Friday while traveling in Alaska.  Tons of thoughts spin around my head begging to get out, but alas, I don’t possess the organizational skills at the moment to responsibly let them out!  Thus, I’ve decided to share these photos with you. I’ve always loved birds of prey, ever since a kid and my father was swooped on by a red-tail hawk while running one day back home in the canyons of my childhood.  I remember being fascinated by their beauty, size, grace and power.  The subject of these photos may be the most stunning, visually, of them all…

Have a wonderful week friends!!  Cheers! Continue reading →

My ladies

Continue reading →

Babies on laps, we

Keep hot tea out of reach.

Outside, snowdrops bloom.

“To me, connection, however fleeting, is what life is all about.”

I came across this lovely blog because the author started following Come In From The Cold. Thank you, Lightning Droplets! The title of this piece caught my interest because of the years I spent involved in community arts, and my frequent fear of self-indulgence if the ‘art’ bit took a greater focus than the ‘community’ bit. Continue reading →

Dear friends,

I have focused my attention on my nearest dear ones the last few days, and confess I forgot to post my festive wishes!

I hope, however you are spending this week, that it is full of joy, love, and a strong sense of belonging. I hope that you find peace amid the chaos, and contentment as well as delight. Whatever you believe, whatever your culture, whatever you celebrate, I wish you all good things for 2014. May all YOUR wishes come true.

Thank you once more for the support you have shown Kirk and I during 2013.

With warm thoughts,
Linda x

Last week was a bit of a milestone week for me. With a six month old son who won’t take a bottle and has only recently started on solid food, I was to attend a three-day training course. It was one of these opportunities that I knew I had to take, but it was going to mean pulling in favours from all directions. Alan (my partner) didn’t have enough holidays to cover the full three days so we had to cast the net a bit wider for babysitters. I sent an email to immediate family and one very dear friend and within hours the days were covered. My parents would do the first day, Stella (my friend) the second, and Alan the third. I know that it was exciting for the grandparents and a family friend to finally get Findlay to themselves but it was still quite an undertaking, especially when he had to brought to me at least once a day for a feed.

“OK Gran, let’s do this.”

Continue reading →

Judgey-Pants

Of course I would like to believe I don't judge people. But I do. All the time. I don't judge people on their skin colour, sexual orientation, gender, religion, perceived ability, age, etc, etc... I really never feel judgement rising when it comes to circumstance, situation, or identity. If people are Born This 
Way, I am pretty much open to and accepting of anything. I thrive within diversity so you will often find me (a white, heterosexual, non-disabled person) hanging about at the edges, enjoying the company of people who have been labelled, marginalised, or excluded.  Continue reading →